DAMN IT!!!!

argue v my mom ytd
jz bcz of little stuff...
den become bigger ....

dad alwiz tell mi n bro
anythg...u all can jz discuss v ur mom
but
it wun b
n
it wun works
avtime v wana discuss
she will jz put her thinking on us
n
she never noe wad r us thinking about

i noe she is worring
but
dis is not da way
likdis will jz let mi feel stress
n
feel like no freedom
even freedom in talking

hate dis!!!

ytd when she was talking dis n dat
wad go thru my mind is jz...
if u doesnt like mi
den i go die...
datz all
since dat im not ur perfect daughter
n other is much more better den mi
datz y u alwiz compare mi wif others ppl

i was try to control myself to get argue v u all da time
n
u will jz say
now getting big ad la...
when i talking to u u oso no nid gv respond ad...
d other way round...
when i ans wad u say
now wad i say oso useless ad la
u all hv ur own opinion

can any1 tell mi wad shud i do??
since da above situation happened...


i feel dat im vy useless
useless in study...
in friends...
in love...
even in family...

she alwiz thk dat
i din care bout da family oni
i duno how to face her...

all she told my dad is rite??
n
dad will jz blame us da v din care about her feeling
did she care bout mine feeling???
i nv let my mom feel safe??
alwiz make her worry??
did i??
n
all is my fault
no one else

ALL IS MY FAULT!!!!

feel better if i say so??


im trying cutting agn...
other den dis
i duno wad else can i do to release
since im not da good gal
den i'll b da bad gal
bad daughter
hate mi ba...
i will punish myself
i noe u wun...
u will jz call him
n tell him
u r sad bcz of mi
u feel helpless
n
he will den call mi to scold mi n blame mi

but den
when i feel helpless
hu is coming to help mi??
hu am i going to blame??
hu is thr for mi???